Welcome to Florida, where something’s always trying to kill you.
The Sunshine State is the lightning-strike capital and the shark-bite capital. We have hurricanes, tornadoes, stealthy sinkholes, rabid raccoons, abandoned pythons, venomous spiders and, yes, even the sunshine can kill you (think melanoma).
Take, for instance, flesh-eating bacteria. Last month, health officials announced the Vibrio vulnificus microorganism had claimed the life of a Palm Coast man after he’d gone fishing in the Halifax River near Ormond Beach. His was the ninth death and 27th case of the infection among Florida residents this year.
There is also the fresh-water Naegleria fowleri, the brain-eating amoeba in springs and warm-water lakes. Cases are rare, nearly always fatal and Florida has more of them than any other state.
Ciguatera poisoning is from found in large, reef-dwelling fish such as snapper and grouper. It is neither killed by cooking nor detectable by odor.
Florida also has venomous snakes, giant constrictor snakes, alligators, crocodiles. Even lots of stinging and biting insects, like mosquitoes, fire ants, biting flies and deer ticks, which can transmit disease or venom. Let’s not even mention the sharks and the REALLY awful hot humid weather which makes for a happy haven for many of these dangerous critters, sparks bad environmental conditions and make you miserable. And there may be something to be said for the demographics and location that can escalate crime and really slow down drivers (age). I’ll not be moving or even visiting Florida soon. No offense…
Fark has made a joke out of Florida noting that strange things happen there, giving them their own weirdness category, [Florida], because that sort of explains it all.