The Easter non-miracle of goldfishes

Oh, boy. What people find meaningful is beyond me…

‘Miracle’ snack no fish tale for Melbourne woman | FLORIDA TODAY |

Patti Burke eats two or three pounds of Goldfish crackers in a week, one by one, looking for the saltiest of the snacks. But only once has she found a sign from God on a little orange cracker.

When I picked this one up, I knew he was special,” the Melbourne woman said of her Holy Week discovery. “He had a cross on him, and he had a crown circle up by his head. Something I’ve never seen before out of all the Goldfish I’ve eaten.”

Burke couldn’t believe it on Easter Sunday, when her pastor, D. Scott Worth, began talking about fish as a symbol of Christianity in front of the congregation of Presbyterian Church of the Good Shepherd in Melbourne. The reason the fish became a symbol is unknown, though it could be the story of Jonah and the whale or Jesus feeding the 5,000 with loaves and fish, he said.

She and her pastor believe it’s a sign – eternal life, with the circle around the cross.

She did call Pepperidge Farm because she wondered if the special fish meant she won a contest. Nope. They had no explanation. She also said that they told her this could not happen in the factory. It must be a miracle. None of her photos of the cracker turned out, she said.

Here is a picture.
cross goldfish cracker

Yes, it’s a screw imprint. Frankly, if you eat pounds of these every week (as she says she does), you are bound to come across the oddballs rather often. I bet she will look more closely now and find even more odd ones out. Because oddities happen. It’s not a miracle. In fact, it’s absolutely normal. But people see meaning in random things. To me, I would have never thought “cross” and NO WAY get “eternal life” out of it but we are seekers of meaning. Some people more than others. *shakes head, walks away*

  12 comments for “The Easter non-miracle of goldfishes

  1. April 4, 2013 at 6:49 PM

    God, is there even a name for that fallacy? Wow.

  2. RDW
    April 4, 2013 at 6:53 PM

    Personally, I prefer Cheez-Its. I don’t think that they have any miraculous or metaphysical properties to them. Probably not, I’m guessing. But they’re pretty darn tasty. But if you consider that a box of Cheez-Its only has 7 oz. in it, she must pretty much continuously munch them.

  3. Eve
    April 4, 2013 at 7:16 PM

    That’s clearly an alien.

  4. Greg Martinez
    April 4, 2013 at 7:21 PM

    It’s Florida…what more do you need to know about this?

  5. April 4, 2013 at 9:14 PM

    I would engage you in spirited debate to defend this state Greg Martinez…but I got nuthin’. I will say I know a lot of smart people in Melbourne, FL, but most of them went to Florida Institute or Technology..which is a pretty good school.

  6. Chris Howard
    April 4, 2013 at 9:57 PM

    Isn’t the literal definition of a miracle some thing, or event, that violates all “natural” (whatever that means) laws, and or, explination(s)?

  7. Brian
    April 5, 2013 at 7:20 AM

    If that is a screw imprint, And Pepperidge farms says it didnt happen in their factory, someone needs to do some food safety investigation, yes?

  8. Pat Katt
    April 5, 2013 at 8:57 AM

    You have to eat the cracker to get the benefit of the miracle.

  9. RayG
    April 5, 2013 at 9:23 AM

    Clearly the sign of the Messiah.. it’s the “King of The Jaws”

  10. Warren
    April 5, 2013 at 11:19 AM

    Critical research failure: the Greek word for fish, ichthus, is an acronym used by early Christians. I think it’s “Jesus Christ, god our savior.”

  11. Chris Howard
    April 5, 2013 at 11:30 AM

    Mmmmm! Savor the savior!

  12. Curt
    April 6, 2013 at 12:02 PM

    Jeez-its are better. Every bite brings you closer to heaven.

Comments are closed.